Site icon Juna Brookes

4 Proven Tools for Building Self-esteem

woman looking at blackboard
What do we do when our core needs are not met? Feeling seen, heard and accepted are essential needs for a joyful life. When these needs are met, we feel we belong, we feel safe enough to explore, grow and learn. However, as we look around, we notice that instead of acceptance and inclusion, what prevails is rejection. Too many of us were disowned by family members or peers, we were discouraged and judged. And it’s no surprise that those hurt that way, are the now the ones feeling, ‘I am not enough’.

 

We learned from others that is alright to hide ourselves. On a global scale, masking our unhappiness and rejecting parts of ourselves has become the norm.  If we are not careful, we could become just another link in a chain of perpetuating trauma.

 

Without people who see, listen, and accept us, and, most importantly, teach us about connection and meaning, chances are that we will experience low self-esteem. The ‘I am not enough’ belief is a deep-seated pattern that creates confusion and long-lasting misery. It is what fuels the inner critic that puts us down mercilessly.

 

The ‘I am not enough’ belief keeps us in a black hole. As long as we are there, we are cut off from our potential and joy of living. The only way out is through building self-esteem. Here are 4 powerful tools that can free you from the grip of unworthiness:

 

Learn from people who healed themselves

 

We are all born worthy of love. But as we grow up most of us lose contact with our worthiness. There are many wonderful people – speakers, authors, scientists, artists, explorers, therapists, who are here to spread love and knowledge. Individuals who worked on themselves and became mentors and pillars of support for those who want to live differently. These people can teach you so much about self-acceptance, only through example. Being in the presence of or just listening to someone anchored in their worthiness is enough to make a difference.

 

A consistent journaling practice

 

A multitude of studies have shown the efficacy of therapeutic journaling. Starting a writing practice strengthens your immune system, can help you sleep better and boosts confidence. You can begin by writing down your doubts about yourself, and express your concerns or anxieties about a certain situation. After a while, you can revisit what you wrote and see if your fears and insecurities manifested the way you thought they would. When you feel ready, you can write the good things that happened – your successes, big and small, and celebrate them. This practice will rewire your brain, cleanse the clutter of your mind, and provide clarity.

 

Hypnosis for confidence

 

A skilled hypnotherapist can help you change the mental patterns that no longer serve you. Hypnotherapy is a great way to dive into parts of your mind you normally don’t have access to, and dissolve the patterns that hinder your progress.

 

Counselling

 

Living with unworthiness is like having a wound that continues to bleed. Counseling can provide support as you transition from low self-esteem to ‘I am enough’. The counselor can show you how to break through the confines of low confidence, and how to create sustainable change.

 

As you choose a different narrative and go from unworthiness to ‘I am enough’, everything will fall into place. Each moment you pay attention to yourself and identify the thoughts and actions that pull you back into ‘I am not enough’, represents a small victory. And as you begin to taste the freedom of ‘I am enough’, a new world will open in front of you. A world where you have the power and inspiration to make your dreams and vision a reality.

 

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